Unless the Lord Builds the House

God’s Design for the Family

One of the greatest problems in our world today is that too many homes and families are not built by the Lord, that is, they are not built according to the principles God has laid out in His Word. This booklet examines the key responsibilities God has given to husbands, wives, children, and parents, as taught by the Apostle Paul in his letter to the Colossians. (32 pp.)
 

Table of Contents

1. Introduction — Unless the Lord Builds the House
   “Unless the LORD builds the house, they labor in vain who build it…” (Psalm 127:1) While this expression might apply to anything that God’s people build, when you read the following verses of this Psalm (vs. 3-5), it seems clear that the word “house” refers to a household or a home, that is, a family. One ...
2. Marriage — Instituted by God
   Paul begins with marriage, the foundation of the home. Marriage was instituted by God in the very beginning. We read in Genesis 1 and 2 how God created all things in six days and rested from His work on the seventh. At the end of each day we read: “And God saw that it was good.” However, after God ...
3. Wives — Submit to Your Own Husbands
   In Colossians 3, Paul begins by specifying the primary responsibility that the wife is to focus on in marriage. “Wives, submit to your own husbands, as is fitting in the Lord.” (Col. 3:18) The word “submit” means “to place or arrange under,” to place one’s self in subjection to the authority of another. In the case of wives, ...
4. Husbands — Love Your Wives
   “Husbands, love your wives, and be not bitter toward them.” (Col. 3:19) The husband’s primary responsibility is to love his wife. The question is: What kind of love does God have in mind? There are four different Greek words for love: eros, storge, phileo, and agape. Eros is the word for sensual or physical love. It describes having ...
5. Parents and Children
   Whenever we see a moral and spiritual decline in society, one of the contributing factors to such apostasy is disobedience to parents. Paul lists this as one of the characteristics of the Gentile world prior to the call of Abram (Rom. 1:30). He also tells Timothy that during the last days of this present dispensation ...
6. Children — Obey Your Parents
   “Children, obey your parents in all things, for this is well pleasing to the Lord.” (Col. 3:20) The primary responsibility God gives to children is to obey their parents. The word “obey” is literally “to hear under.” It means not only to hear with the ears, but to take heed to what is said and to ...
7. God’s Instructions for Fathers
   “Fathers, do not provoke your children, lest they become discouraged.” (Col. 3:21) The first thing we notice about this verse is that God does not address this directive to parents but specifically to fathers. Why is this the case? Mothers obviously play a vital role in the raising of their children. In Titus 2:4-5, we read how ...
8. Wisdom to Build a Family
   If a husband or father is to build a godly home and family and provide solid spiritual leadership, that home must be founded upon wisdom. “Through wisdom a house is built, and by understanding it is established; by knowledge the rooms are filled with all precious and pleasant riches.” (Prov 24:3-4) This type of wisdom is not ...